Emotional Control

When emotional control is weak, it can impact students in the classroom and if this skill does not strengthen it can cause issues later in life. Having strong emotional control does not mean that someone never gets upset, disappointed, or frustrated. Everyone feels these emotions at some point. Emotional control is having the ability to respond to these feelings in a way that allows you to stabilize them to do whatever tasks are ahead of you. When your emotional control is stronger you know the strategies you need in order to get those feelings “under control” for the moment. Even with strong emotional control, we all have times that our emotions and feelings get the best of us.

As an educator or parent, there are some things you can do to help support emotional control development:

• Talk about emotions
• Use a timer to show how much time the person has to do something or how long they have to wait.
• Use visual supports to show schedules, list expectations, and how to do something. This can include a checklist or to-do list
• Discuss how you feel and what helps you get your feelings “under control”
• Allow for the student/child to have a place they can go to take a break
• Don’t pressure someone to talk about their emotions when the emotions are high
• Read books that include different emotions
• Use visual supports that show different emotional states so that if the student is not able to verbalize how they feel, they can point and show you
• Practice relaxation and calming strategies so that when emotions get high, the strategy is familiar
• Model your thought process when you are using one of your strategies. For example:
  • That person just cut me off (while driving) and that makes me mad. I am going to use some deep breathing to help me relax.
  • I am really upset because my favorite show got canceled, I am going to talk with a friend about this so they can help me not be so angry.
• Use a system such as the Zones of Regulation to use as a structure for talking about emotions.

To learn more about Emotional Control, watch this short video as an overview for staff or parents